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He strolls through the halls of the Master’s TARDIS—through Lolita. He runs one hand along her walls, as he does when he walks through the Type T-40 that he’s bound to—the TARDIS that, as much as one set of his memories, protests, is his. Lolita doesn’t respond to his touch, doesn’t answer in his mind. He understands. She has her Master, and a TARDIS never divides its loyalties.

His Lolita died in the War, when the Master abandoned her for the Doctor—Time Lords often divide their loyalties. He misses her, and he misses the Type-40 that should fill the empty space in his mind, the TARDIS that’s responsible, partially, for the patchwork person he’s become. Rubbishy junker, interfering addled busybody, mixing him up the way she has, trying to make him into the Doctor when he isn’t. The Doctor’s old girl, and his, this new person’s, even dearer friend. Half of him, when he’s already two halves the whole. He should work out a lease system, he thinks. Charge for synapse space. He really needs to get all of these subletters together, arrange some room for him in between all of their differing claims. They’re all his property now, after all. Well. Not the TARDIS. But the two others.

They’re dead, like Lolita, and he’s the benefactor and not certain he feels like he’s benefiting. They’re ghosts and they are going to have to learn to rest peacefully, or it’ll be sleepless nights for him for the rest of his life.

Damn, damn, damn, he needs a name.

He turns a corner, hand still trailing along the wall, and without thinking he turns in at the first door on the right. This should be the Herparium, and it shouldn’t surprise him when it is, but it does. The Master’s memories come as instinct still, startling bubbles of certainty and knowledge, and each one that finds its mirror in reality, that finds confirmation, unbalances him.

He is the Master.

He is the Doctor.

He isn’t either. He’s the blurring, the tmesis, the portmanteau, the word between the two, made up of the two, fusion/fission. The blend. Of oil and water.


The Herparium smells of the dry dusty must of scales and the bright veined life of foliage. The branches of trees tangle overhead, light filtering green and gold through them, diffuse and liquid, full of the hazy damp heat of the place, pregnant light falling through pregnant air, air rich with pauses and eddies that trails across his face like skin and sweat. )
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And then it was time for the Moctor to go meet his adopted-ex-vampiric-Time-Lord-son-thing-person, [ profile] t_eyla's [ profile] firstofhiskind. Which means we now have a Doctor-Master mesh talking to a Time-Lorded Spike from BtVS. I blame the internet. One can always blame the internet.

Also, my Moctor has no clue what to call himself. The Expert? The Mobius? Should he just give up and change his name to some obscure symbol? Decisions, decisions.

And have some Firefly references. Because a little meta is good for you.

I could just call you Grumpy Twat. )
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Chatplay being the Great Enabler, [ profile] t_eyla and I mucked about more with the Moctor idea I came up with earlier, in which my Doctor discovers he's both the Doctor *and* the Master. This time, her canon!Ten ([ profile] or_timelords) and my...whatever he is, poor man, he's probably very tired of me running theoreticals with him, confronted each other.

Who do you think you're *talking* to? D'you think there are two of us in here, left-brain, right-brain, the Odd Couple, flatmates? There's just *me.* Two sets of memories, one man. It's a royal cock-up, but that's how it is. )
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I have this thing, it seems, for coming up with theoreticals and "what ifs" and testing them out, especially if they involve exploring identity issues. This is a transcript of a little fiddling about [ profile] laser_not_sonic and I did in AIM, exploring an alternate idea for where my Doctor's drums may have come from (and also explaining what, exactly, happened to the Master in my Doctor's universe, a question I still haven't answered for myself, definitively).

I'm oddly fond of the scenario, even though it would be ridiculously complicated and disorienting to work out in RP,'s sticking with me. I may have to play with it, somehow. It explains a lot about the character, in my head. Though it brings up as many questions as it answers, and new holes to fill.

Jasper: ...I had this idea of AUing my own AU earlier, where my Doctor figures out he hears the drums because he actually *is* the Master, the Master having taken over the Doctor's body to survive the Time War (since in my fanon, the Doctor was the only one who'd be in any position to survive the War, since he's chosen to trigger the Eye of Harmony--ye olde 'eye of the storm' effect--and the Master'd learned about this ahead of time and decided he wanted to survive, dammit, because that's what he does). And he had to really be convincingly the Doctor for the Council to go ahead with the plan, so he subsumed his personality as far as he could, set it up to assert itself gradually, later. Which it does, in pieces, with the drums and the sliding towards violence, and in dreams. But it integrates instead of taking over, which wasn't the plan, and so you've got this new person who's kind of both of them and kind of someone new. I may write fic about this, or just ramble in AIM! )
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More chatplay, again with [ profile] laser_not_sonic. Having played out a scenario with the Master fobwatched as Harry Saxon traveling with my Doctor, we ended up playing out another scenario with both Doctor and Master fobwatched, turn-of-the-century-ish. This isn't my Doctor; this is a canon one, fobwatched, so that was a bit of a switch for me, he's less touchy.

This one's relatively short! Really. And they're just being cute, not much substance, and talking about taking a break from their lives to travel together. Without any fighting! That'd be a first, if they were still Time Lords.

They're close, as close as too people can be, and of course they want to be closer, that's the human condition. It makes for wonderful discourse, but it's not something that can be helped. )
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So, [ profile] laser_not_sonic and I were chatting about Watch!Ten and her Master, as we were finishing up their angst!swordfight thread, and we ended up discussing possible dark!futures for them, in which the Master succeeds in corrupting the Doctor further and the two decide to do the ruling-the-universe thing together (we also discussed the ball scene in Labyrinth as played by the Master as Jareth and the Doctor not as Sarah, dammit, he objects in silver vaguely-Renn-Faire gear and the glitteriness of this, and yes, I'm being infected by the Master/Doctor shippage, it's terrible XP). But, we ended up committing extended narration/pseudo-fic, and it all turned out very tragically for both Master and Doctor and it's not a good future, but it is oi, a bit wrenching. So here it is, I think it's worth the read.

[ profile] laser_not_sonic Well, at least this Doctor understands the fact that not everybody is redeemable. And that sometimes death can be a very good thing indeed. Though, argh, all this talk of Koschei and Theta in conjunction with this Doctor's darker tendencies is making the Master think sappy thoughts of the Doctor ruling the universe at his side. Because wouldn't that be fun?! *bounces* And who better? Surely they two are the only ones left in the universe with the right, and the ability.
[ profile] watch_is_me The Doctor would like to point out that ruling things involves a lot of time and responsibility and staying in *one place.* Can you see him going along with any of that, Master?
[ profile] laser_not_sonic The Master could do the staying in one place, and the Doctor could... go out and quell rebellions
[ profile] laser_not_sonic Or something
[ profile] watch_is_me lol
[ profile] laser_not_sonic *handwave*
[ profile] watch_is_me Ten: "Great, I'm the errand boy."
[ profile] watch_is_me Ten: "Run down to the shops and quell that rebellion, if you don't mind."
[ profile] watch_is_me Ten: B| "Quell your own rebellion."
[ profile] laser_not_sonic No, but seriously, if they ever did rule the universe together, he wouldn't just be the errand boy. They'd be equals. And the universe would cower before them, the Master and his *ahem* and the Doctor.
[ profile] watch_is_me lol
[ profile] watch_is_me I'm seeing the Doctor as running around adding new bits to the empire, and the Master consolidating.
[ profile] watch_is_me The Doctor would probably also be good at finding new talent and tracking down discontent.
[ profile] watch_is_me The Doctor is not pleased at me for saying any of this.
[ profile] laser_not_sonic See, he wouldn't just be an errand boy! He'd be essential to the empire. Besides, *smirk* every king needs a queen.
[ profile] watch_is_me Ten: "Yes, that's why you have *Lucy.* :|"
[ profile] laser_not_sonic Oi, this is the new Time Lord empire- hundreds of years into the future. Lucy's only going to last another seventy
[ profile] laser_not_sonic He says this very casually, but he will be all full of repressed anger and grief and confusion when she does die, and have no idea how to deal with any of it
[ profile] watch_is_me The Doctor will be happy to lend a shoulder to cry on. He's had people die on him before.
[ profile] watch_is_me This may or may not lead to consolation!sex.
[ profile] watch_is_me In which case, hoorah, long live the queen, oops :\
[ profile] laser_not_sonic The mun appreciates this, but the Master does not. He will kill things and destroy things and sulk for long periods of time because of course she was going to die, she was a human; what, does the Doctor think he didn't know that? And he'll be even more obnoxious than usual, because he... has he ever grieved at someone's death? I don't think he actually has.
watch_is_me: God, the Doctor will be insufferable. )


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February 2010

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